In the country

When May comes, one of the things I really look forward to is going to see my Mother's family in central Arkansas, twenty miles from anywhere. A consequence of getting older, I guess, is that what used to be a dreaded experience, the family reunion, is now something that I love. It happened after many years of not going to the reunions. One year, maybe because our Mother is getting older, my brother and I decided to go with Mother to the reunion. The relatives are, for the most part, the same, and I guess I am, too. The closest I can come to what it feels like is lifting a burden off my shoulders. The burden, in this case, is one of an ungrateful child who didn't appreciate the simply joys of being with aunts, uncles and cousins I've known for many ears. Seeing them and telling them in so many words, how much I cherish this time together and please forgive me for being such a ungrateful child is something I needed to do. This was something I didn't tell my aunts, uncles and cousins outright, but I would like to think that this was something unspoken among us, something to be said, understood, and forgotten. How pointless it is to dwell on things I did in the past that, in this case, I had a chance to make right. The effect of this is, for me, the years and years of good memories that came flooding back. The days exploring the thickets and forests, relishing the clean air and experiences of being a child again. We talk, eat and drink and remember those times, tell stories and wish the weekend would never end. The first thing I did when I got back to work was to mark off the week around Memorial Day 2012, the simply joy of looking forward to this again.